Today I want to use this post to clarify a few things- this is going to be pretty short asnd sweet, but it’s something important.
I’ve been a Pagan now for nearly seven years, I self initiated nearly five years ago- which is actually pretty scary when I think about it!
The first couple of years that I spent on the Pagan path were spent getting to know nature, I didn’t know a lot about Paganism at all, I just trusted my instincts and prayed to Mother Earth. I was happy flailing about, I knew there was a higher power- I had all my life, but this was the first time I’d called it ‘nature’, before now it had either been in the form of the Christian God or as a nameless, faceless power.
I was about thirteen when I went to the library after school and found a book of spells- I can’t actually remember the title of it and don’t really want to break into my old school to find out, so you’ll just have to trust me that it was good. I studied the book and what it said about witchcraft and Wicca with absolute fascination. I’d been obsessed with witchcraft my whole life and the idea of actually practising it was one that filled me up like nothing else.
I did a self dedication and decided to wait for a year and a day until Imbolc the next year to initiate myself. I felt strongly that it was important to wait and allow myself to develop as a Wiccan.
The next three or so years were some of the most challenging of my life, the Gods taught me many lessons but after about two years I was beginning to feel that my calling was elsewhere. I had learnt a lot about Wicca and still to this day am interested and passionate about it, but my interest went deeper.
I realised early on that I had a strong connection to the Gods and the Ancients, I also realised that I had a passion for all things Celtic. I’d had this interest my whole life and it was almost a relief to recognise it again. The whole process felt like coming home.
I began studying the Ancient Celts, their lore and myths and found myself being drawn deeper and deeper into it. Around this time (aged sixteen/seventeen) I started to discover the Pagan community, Pagan music and writings and I found myself starting to feel truly at home.
I started to identify with Druidry, to this day I still won’t call myself a Druid- I don’t think I have the right to, and I won’t for a long, long time. I study the religion of the Ancient Celts and mix it in with my own practises and rituals. I take my inspiration for rituals from my Wiccan background and my own habits. For me Paganism isn’t about magick, it’s about connecting and worshipping the Gods.
I believe that all Gods and spirits and creatures exist, I believe that there is more in the world than we can possibly know and we are not in control, I believe that the Gods will always have the last laugh.
The Gods that I follow, worship and work with are from the Celtic pantheon. I don’t try and pin myself down as anything- though it’s taken me a long time to come to terms with this. If you asked me I’d call myself a Pagan- if pressed, a Celtic Pagan… if pressed and held at gunpoint I’d say ‘a student of Druidry’ but you won’t get much else from me than that.
We live in a world that is obsessed with labels, but I think that sometimes religion and spirituality doesn’t fit very well into any kind of label.