A Little Rollercoaster

So, as the title suggests this may start with being a tad depressing, but it will end on a happy note, I promise!

A couple of things have been really grating on my nerves recently- the first thing is that I’ve now missed my period two months in a row… oops. I thought it was coming on Sarturday night but it was only a few weak spots- so now we’re back to square one. I feel rough and more than a little concerned; the last time I missed two in a row I ended up being very, very ill- I’m putting it down to depression as I only miss them when my mood’s really low- which is the other thing that’s bothering me.

The second thing is what happened last night (I say that like you must all psychically know what I’m talking about…) I became pretty hysterical and convinced that the shadow-men were coming for me- I then went even more loopy and stood naked in the bathroom scrubbing myself with a ratty towel until I was sore.

Right now I’m worried about the future, my friends and relationships and my ability to live independently- the psychiatrist told me that there was nothing anyone could do to make me better and right now I’m scared and lonely and desperate. I badly need help- but there’s nothing that can help me.

I was pretty scared last night, not sure what happened to me or why but it’s really thrown me off- part of me keeps saying that I can’t possibly go through life with the potential for that to happen at any moment, but the other part reminds me that I really don’t have a choice.

Anyway, in slightly cheerier news it was snowing up here in Yorkshire today- and I took some lovely photos on the way to school, so here they are:

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’til next time,

Wren x

 

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