It’s Friday night which means a hasty post on Paganism before I run off to my exciting social life…
Today I’m giving you a quick run down on Paganism and loss- mostly I’ll be focussing on bereavement, whether or not I stay on that topic or expand to talk about loss more generally is down to how much time I have!
Personally I’m no stranger to loss, it’s really quite ridicualous how many loved ones I’ve had to say goodbye to over the course of my life and it hasn’t gotten any easier as I’ve grown up.
Looking to the Gods has always helped to me to deal with loss and lessened the pain, I remember a while ago that I felt lonely and isolated- I was depressed and surrounded my couples- but as I was walking to school one morning I found myself surrounded by birdsong, the other people on the street were walking along as if they couldn’t hear anything but I stopped and stared at the trees, I knew that the Gods were giving me a message- that I wasn’t on my own.
The reason why I’m talking about loneliness is because I believe that it’s very closely linked with loss- when you lose someone or something you’re left with a hole in your life, and the only way to make yourself feel better is to try and fill that hole with something.
I tihnk that that’s how and why I’m so religious, I find that focussing my energy into projects and into my faith means that I can have a full and fulfilling life- the ‘hole in your life’ theory explains why people can turn to drugs, drink and sex. When I talk about those ‘vices’ I’m not necessarily referring to people to who abuse them to such an extent as to ruin their lives. We’ve all turned to ‘vices’ to fill holes in our lives at some time- I know that when I’m down or upset I tend to start flirting with people I barely know. It’s not something I’m proud of but I’m human- the knowledge that someone finds me attractive and is willing to engage in flirtation with me makes me feel like I’m worthy, and those feelings push away the hurt I feel when I’ve lost something or someone.
The better way of dealing with this is to focus it into something productive- I write, draw, drum and pray- these all give me outlets, praying to the Gods is especially good as they can make me feel loved without me having to try and make myself appealing. They love me unconditionally.
I’m ending this here as I have to leave… forgive mistakes, I don’t have time to edit 😦