I know that some of my recent posts have been leaning towards personal, and away from anything intellectual; such as religion, feminism or mental health. Right now Mentalist Monday is the only thing I’m consciously trying to keep going. The next couple of months are going to be crazy, so I’m trying to take the pressure off myself; as well as that, they’re going to be very emotional and I started this blog to vent.
Essentially, I don’t know what I’m writing here; I’m just trying to give you a heads up that there will be posts three times a week, Monday will still have a mental health theme, but the other two will just be focussed on whatever I’m thinking about- I hope you’re okay with that?
I recently wrote about the acting project I’ve gotten involved in. Originally it was a production of ‘Coriolanus’ for a theatre company who had been booked to perform at the RSC. Well, the RSC booking fell through (welcome to the performing arts industry…) and we had half the cast disappear.
We were kind of left in a bit of a depressing situation, however, we were all having such a good time that we didn’t see why the fun had to end. We found another script, it was originally written by a friend of the director so we can mess about with it and we don’t have to deal with royalties, and we’re planning to tour it about this summer.
If any of you are in the UK and love theatre then watch this space! Fuck anonymity, if you want to see it I’ll tell you where and how.
I’ll admit it, I had low expectation for the script- but it turned out to be pretty amazing and very funny, so I’m now incredibly pumped up about the whole experience. Plus I’ve gone from a minor part in Coriolanus to a main part in this (and a bloody good main part too) so I’m over the moon.
Next week our director’s going to be away, and despite only knowing me for a couple of weeks he’s put me in charge of rehearsals. In the next week I have to edit down the script, cast two members of the company, decide on the staging and block the entire play.
To put this into perspective, this guy has known everyone else in the company for about a month longer than me; we’re only even had one conversation just between the two of us, and he’s put me in charge of the project and given me ultimate power for a week.
When I went to the Stage School of Hell last year I had my confidence completely broken down. I left there and couldn’t even think about acting for almost a year. When I first did a monologue in front of my now director I was terrified- but it went fine.
Slowly I’m working through what happened during my year at the SSoH. I’m trying to ease myself back into performing and remind myself why I loved it. Everything good about it was killed whilst I was at that place and I feel so sad about it.
I’ve done a decent amount of directing, it’s something that I greatly enjoy. Sadly, the attitude at the SSoH was that of ‘if you’re not the best at this, you’re not allowed to do it’ and one of the people in my group worked as a teacher- so she was obviously always in charge of organising and directing and no-one else got a look in. That attitude made me feel so useless and crap.
Now I feel like I’m completely back in my element. Someone who doesn’t even know me that well has deduced that I have my head screwed on right and can be trusted. I feel empowered and really happy in myself; I’ve spent this afternoon breaking down the script into bullet points (it’s a looooong script) so that we can easily go through it, change plot points and edit in our next rehearsal. Currently I have my tea on the go and then I’m planning to jot out some ideas for staging.
It’s been a strange and crazy week, but right now I feel really content.
’til next time,